SAKIT HATI!

suddenly i feel so DOWN.. ada saja yang nak mencabar kewibawaan n kredibiliti aku.. kenapa arr? i don't dress like phua chu kang or at least dress like a man, it doesn't mean that i am weak.. i work in a man's world, full of harshness, foul languages and of course sexual harrasment.. i'm so used to it.. and i still survive..

i don't think those peope who interviewed me, who have prefixes in front of their names ever climbs half the buildings i climb, and they called themselves building surveyors? lame lame... theoretically yeah.. but what do they know really? huh come on! do you ever know that i have lost one of my ovary because it got twisted when i climb onto a 50ft rooftop, up and down 6 times.. and now i'm only half woman!

i did tell my students that building surveyors must have perfect BMI.. just like people in the military (but i don't think they care about BMIs either) overweight means, they wont fit into the catladder because they are just a bunch of fat bumps!! aku sakit hati OK! dah 2 tahun aku tunggu!!! apa lagi yang korang nak aku buktikan ha? nak suruh aku amik xm kenapa pulak.. ramai jer org yang tak amik xm boleh dapat professional kenapa aku tak boleh? asik cakap aku nih half bake.. apa half bake? depan aku berani pulak cakap pasal half bake2 nih.. depan Sr Z (undisclose name) tak berani langsung! entah apa2!! marah nih!!! mendidih!!!!

lagi satu.. kalau dah org lain buat benda yang aku nak buat.. dengan lebih elok.. biaqlaa.. aku takder duit nak buat.. aku dah try mintak tapi takder org nak bagi.. so biaqlaaa... sebab tu la aku tak suka nak share idea aku dengan sapa2 pun.. banyak gila OPPORTUNIST dalam dunia nih.. KIRI KANAN DEPAN BELAKANG... penah dengar TRADE SECRET??? sebab tu la org tak sembang biznes kat kedai kopi!! aku yang buat senyap2 mcm nih pun org rembat idea aku.... takper laa... i have different intention altogether.. not for profit but to help others.. my intention is pure!! org yang baca benda nih wouldn't understand tapi BFF aku akan paham.. dan.. ada la pulak family members yang being so unsupportive.. memperlekehkan aku.. macamla aku nih loser.. aku taulaa hang banyak duit.. satu sen pun tak nak tolong aku.. tolong org lain boleh la pulak.. tolong bagi free2 buta2 jer.. itu family member tu... uhhh mmg tak best!!! dalam satu buku yang aku baca org yg tulis nih mmg pakar gila bab2 motivasi2 ni, dia cakap.. family member la yg akan dengki lebih2 yang akan condemn lebih2... jgn tak tau OK.. itu mat saleh tu.. so BEWARE!!! macam2 hal kan.. its ok.. anyway takper, last month bulan yang paling best dalam hidup aku.. bulan nih ada sedit tak berapa best.. next month mesti best!!! God have other plans for me.. :) and i know.. because every clouds have a silver lining.. cheers!!!